They're All We Have

The Easter Bunny brought our cat 'grass' this year. (Actually they are oat grains, but it's called grass for whatever reason.)

The sprouts are up and the cats love them. (The one that gets to go outside with us eats his stash outside, while the indoor kitty snacks on hers inside.)

She chirps dainty meows when we bring it in, she gets so excited! It's quite cute, and brings me joy.

It's really starting to look like the cats will indeed be "all we have". I am not doing ok with this realization. I love my kitties, but I can't teach them how to cook my Gramie's famous cookies. I can't read them bedtime stories and have them finish the sentence. I can't see them off on their first day of kindergarten. I won't watch them graduate... I won't see a little Tim and/or Susie running around in our back yard, enjoying our pool with their friends. There are a lot of wont's.

Someone recently said, well at least you won't have to pay for the expense of kids. Unfortunately, we have spent quite a bit on kids. The fertility cycles weren't cheap. (I could have sent a couple of kids to college for 4 years for what we paid to date.) I'm glad we tried, but am just sad that it didn't work, despite our efforts, and I'm still dealing with the emotional aspects of the entire thing.

Our cats are the only "family" we have. As much as I love them, it doesn't fill the gaping hole I feel every time I see a child and realize I will never experience true motherhood. The feelings seem even more pronounced around the holidays (especially Mother's Day). Hopefully I'll be able to overcome the lack of children and find something that fills the hole in my heart.

Can you be too eco-friendly?

Although I desperately want a baby, I admire people who are ok without having children. I think it's a person's right to decide if they want children or not. Ideally, it should be a choice, not something denied to people.

I understand not wanting children for personal reasons, no desire, a bad experience, their career or lifestyle is more important and/or rewarding, even fear. However I am sometimes surprised to hear some of the reasons for not having children. The latest? They aren't eco-friendly!

To each their own I suppose, but I have to wonder, why someone who doesn't want to have children for this reason is able to get pregnant, only to have an abortion because they don't want the child's carbon footprint to damage the earth.

I probably wouldn't have as strong of a reaction if it wasn't so hard for us to have a child. I'm not against abortions, I feel it's a woman's right. That said, I do have issues with women using abortions as birth control, as it just seems irresponsible. I'm not sure what I think about "eco-friendly" abortions, other than if everyone did it, who would be here to enjoy the planet they are trying to protect?

I feel life on our planet is fragile, one well timed asteroid could wipe us out. Wouldn't it be better to have a child that wants to explore their world and perhaps worlds beyond? It's great to keep our planet in good shape, but at what cost?

I also find it ironic that yet again, that as much as I want a child, I am left without one, while others who try to avoid them at all costs, get pregnant. I suppose one could say I'm eco-friendly... but unfortunately in this instance, it's not by choice.

Finding Nemo

My Dad's out visiting, and so we decided to head to Monterrey this week. The exhibit of choice was the Sea Horses. They did a great job of showing off ones I've never seen! This Dragon sea horse was so much fun!!! I love the purple and yellow colors! We couldn't use a flash, so I took the photos with my iPhone. (Some are a bit grainy, but really not bad at all considering it was low light conditions.)

The eels were also cool, if not a bit eerie. They seemed to like hanging out in the holes of the rocks. It was amazing how well they blended in when they "wanted" to. (There are two eels in the picture.)

Can you find the sea horses in this picture? They look like leafy branches! They just drifted around in the current, along the seaweed almost listless. I loved their coloring as well.

Of course the jellyfish tanks are a great stop as well! They don't have a huge exhibit any longer, but the ones they have a gorgeous. The dark blue background helped highlight the jellyfish they had... Sponge Bob would be in hog heaven!

If you're in the area, it's a great place to visit!