Home Care Help
While trying to come to grasp on why my Grandmother's wishes of living at home are not being honored, I discovered that this is quite common. I read that although 90% of Americans want to live/die at home when they get old, less than 25% are allowed to do so. Half of them die in hospitals while another quarter die in nursing homes. Even thought hospice services and other home care options are available.
According to the site, most people don't use hospice services, or when they do, it's for the last few days of life. Although to get the maximum benefit they should be in hospice care for 60 days or more. My Grandmother is struggling in a hospital, when I truly believe if she were allowed to be at home she would be so much happier, and may have avoided getting the pneumonia since she would have been more active. (Nor would her immune system have gone down at the distress of selling her house!) The fact that they are not even treating the pneumonia even though they could upsets me even more.
My Grandmother's only wish was to be able to live at home and to be able to die there when the time came. (Which could be years from now, as many of our relatives lived to be 100 or more, and were mentally sound to the end.) This is not happening for my Grandmother, and it saddens me. Since the family has chosen to not treat her pneumonia and allow her to die, why not take her home to be among things that could comfort her? Allow her to look out on the view of her yard and garden she tended throughout the years, and honor her wish to spend her days in her beloved home. I feel as if I have failed my Grandmother by not being able to convey how much it meant to her to stay at home. I realize it's not my fault, but it doesn't ease the pain.
According to the site, most people don't use hospice services, or when they do, it's for the last few days of life. Although to get the maximum benefit they should be in hospice care for 60 days or more. My Grandmother is struggling in a hospital, when I truly believe if she were allowed to be at home she would be so much happier, and may have avoided getting the pneumonia since she would have been more active. (Nor would her immune system have gone down at the distress of selling her house!) The fact that they are not even treating the pneumonia even though they could upsets me even more.
My Grandmother's only wish was to be able to live at home and to be able to die there when the time came. (Which could be years from now, as many of our relatives lived to be 100 or more, and were mentally sound to the end.) This is not happening for my Grandmother, and it saddens me. Since the family has chosen to not treat her pneumonia and allow her to die, why not take her home to be among things that could comfort her? Allow her to look out on the view of her yard and garden she tended throughout the years, and honor her wish to spend her days in her beloved home. I feel as if I have failed my Grandmother by not being able to convey how much it meant to her to stay at home. I realize it's not my fault, but it doesn't ease the pain.
posted by Susan at 7:10 AM
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